And after all those years, we thought the collision of our hearts was an inelastic one. We thought that our hearts had melded together and that we would weather anything until the day we could be together forever.
And yet things fell apart, and we’ve discovered our collision was elastic; there was just a long time of impact. But now our hearts bounce further and further away from each other and we are strangers again. It is a weird sensation, to acknowledge that feelings for the most part are over with–it is just that nostalgia, and the sadness of how close we once were versus how distant we now are that brings sadness to my heart now. But I no longer wish we could go back in time to be together again.
But you once told me that I would someday see the meaninglessness of the words–in the “I love you”s that we exchanged. Granted, love is not quite how I would describe how I feel about you, except maybe storgic, the words have not lost their meaning. They remind me of a time when I loved everything freely and the world was bright and happy. It reminds me of our rich history and memories I would not trade, had I the choice. Those memories have shaped who I am; they were a time of growth and exploration. It was fun. And so I do not think I will look back and think they were empty. So, you’re wrong again, as you often were about my feelings.
It has been a little over 6 months now, since we have been apart.
But whereas I once looked so bleakly into the future, I am regaining some of my optimism again. I suppose love isn’t a one-shot deal the way I used to. Though maybe true love is.
)
